Wife Devastated As In-Laws Gift Husband With Album That Doesn't Include Any Pics Of Her, Only Of His Ex

December 27, 2019

An awkward photo album present has left a woman feeling very confused. She can't decide whether she's being snubbed on purpose or if she's overreacting.

What happens when your parents-in-law don't like you

It can be a pretty uncomfortable situation when your in-laws don't approve of you. It makes sense that you want their approval. You're married to their child after all and you love your spouse. But unfortunately, it doesn't work that way.

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Not getting along with your in-laws is actually a common problem. It could be that they are overly critical or they may have a legit reason to give you the cold shoulder. According to FocusOnTheFamily, the most important thing to remember is to for spouses to support each other and put forth a united front in cases like this.

How to spot toxic parents-in-law

If you're unsure whether your in-laws are toxic, watch out for the following red flags;

  • They ignore boundaries and even do things you expressly disallow.
  • They try to manipulate you by being dishonest or only being nice when they want something.
  • They criticize and nitpick every little thing you do. Nothing is ever good enough.
  • They're selfish. Everything has to be about what they need, so much so that they expect you to make sacrifices for them constantly.
  • Toxic in-laws can also be outrightly rude and disrespectful.

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An awkward Christmas gift

A woman has taken to the internet to share a very weird situation that happened to her during the holidays.

The poster explained that her husband's parents gifted him with a photo album for Christmas which contained pictures of important moments in his life starting from childhood. Sounds sweet, right?

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However, the issue was that the wife's picture was nowhere to be seen in the album. To make matters worse, her husband's ex's photos were actually there.

There are a lot of pictures with friends- there are even pictures of his ex-girlfriend- Including one portrait of her alone.

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The woman said she felt really uncomfortable about the whole thing.

I was there when the album was given and explored page by page and frankly, I was totally embarrassed when the last page was turned and I found out that I wasn’t in any of the pictures.

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Based on the reactions that followed, people agreed that this seemed like a snub from their in-laws. They advised her to, at least, speak to her husband about the matter before deciding whether or not she should talk to his folks.

How to handle toxic parents-in-law

The way you deal with a toxic in-law depends on their level and type of toxicity.

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Here are some options.

  • If they have issues with boundaries, clearly state what you need and be as consistent as possible. In fact, express your needs with witnesses present so they are less likely to deny what you said if they cross the boundaries.
  • In a situation where your in-laws are very clingy and always wanting to be a part of everything in your marriage, try speaking to your spouse about it. Be united in your dealings so there are no mixed messages.
  • In general, you can try having a mature conversation if you believe the tension between you and your parents-in-law can be rectified.
  • And you may also consider letting it go too. Not everyone has to like you and it's okay if they don't. They aren't the one you're married to.

In a perfect world, everyone will get along, especially family. But this isn't a perfect world and all you can do is play the hand you're dealt. Of course, this doesn't mean allowing yourself to be disrespected. If something bugs you, speak out and if the situation calls for it, defend yourself. What you shouldn't do is sacrifice your happiness to please them. That doesn't end well for anyone.