There's no greater joy than seeing a child growing up in a loving family, surrounded by caring parents. The child might need one of the parents more than the other at different stages of his/her development, depending on the age and necessities of life.
For instance, up to the age of three, the baby needs the mother's attention 24/7, but as he or she enters the period of learning games and active leisure time outdoors, the father's help is crucial.
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Why a child might lean to one of the parents more
As children are growing up, they can choose for themselves who they want to play with today and who will be taking them to kindergarten tomorrow. Such behavioral patterns are quite a natural phenomenon for kids. Another issue is that parents might start to feel jealous and wonder why he or she isn't "the chosen one." Psychologists give their explanations.
1. The child's mental and emotional state
If he or she is scared by sudden movements or an overly loud voice of one of the parents, then next time he/she will definitely not feel comfortable around this parent. Or he or she will act in the exact same way trying to copy the adult's behavior.
Sometimes due to the absence of any rules of behavior and order in the family, children swiftly adopt manipulative behavioral patterns when they try to get what they want by screaming and throwing tantrums.
2. The amount and quality of time spent together
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The mother may be physically present by the baby's side, but simultaneously do her own business paying zero attention to her child. However, the baby needs a parent's full involvement for at least 20 minutes at a time.
3. The age of the child and parents' skills
You must agree that a dad is more likely to give his child a piggyback ride rather than mom. And when you hold a bike while your kid is learning how to ride it, you often need a man's strength. Hence, it's an obvious choice which parent the child will choose to play outdoors! While if you want a new dress tailored for your doll, you will turn to mom for help.
What a parent should do in this case
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If your child clearly prefers one of the parents, there's no way you should punish him or her for such feelings or get upset. Acknowledge that children are entitled to their own emotions and feelings and try to comprehend what it's connected with. Then accept it. It's totally possible that after a while you will be their favorite one because children will move into the next age group.
If the kid is trying to manipulate parents, they certainly need to change their behavior, as most times children just "mirror" adults' actions. This provides food for thought!
We believe that you have a balanced relationship in your family. But in case any problems occur, you can always find the answers to your questions here. Keep calm, parents!
The material in this article is for informational purposes only and does not replace the advice of a certified specialist.