No Longer A Little Girl: 9 Things A Teenager Should Learn About Her Body From Her Mother

Lifestyle & community

June 12, 2019 15:43 By Fabiosa

Daughters’ growing-up begins long before mothers begin to ask intimate questions about their personal life. The first “adult” conversations, the first revelations about changes in the body shouldn’t take the child by surprise. Childhood as a period towards adulthood ends much later than the physical body matures. How can you help her prepare?

Biologically, the period of the appearance of secondary sexual characteristics begins with the release of the first reproductive hormones by the ovaries. In different children, maturation varies from 8 to 16.5 years: from the formation of breasts to the appearance of the first menstruation.

1. Growing up is normal

Explain to your daughter that the change in the size of individual organs, and the growth of hair in the armpits and in the groin indicate that she's becoming an adult. Encourage your daughter with phrases like “Welcome to womanhood!” “How beautiful you are!” “It's super cool!” for the child not to think something wrong is happening to her.

2. Don’t make her feel ashamed

Under no circumstances should you forbid her to wear something that highlights her newly proportioned body! The girl's body will change, and she will continue to be ashamed of herself if you pay attention to the "flaws."

3. Help her overcome natural shame

Sit down with your daughter and tell her how you coped with this condition when you were her age. Measure her chest and buy her first bra together.

4. Encourage her first attempts at self-care

Having noticed her first eyebrow tweezers in her grown-up cosmetic bag, don’t rush to dissuade your daughter from trying to take care of herself because of young age. This often leads to the opposite result, causing the girl to hide from you and do everything secretly.

5. Teach her to listen to her body

Physical changes are sometimes accompanied by unpleasant and sometimes painful sensations that can cause panic in a child. Tell her about learning to listen to what her body is trying to tell her through these sensations.

6. Become her BFF

Purchase personal and intimate hygiene items, and teach her how to use them. This will allow her to see not only a strict mother in you, but also a caring friend.

7. Don’t wait for the initiative from her

Offer your daughter an unobtrusive approach to ask any questions she is interested in, but don’t go into lengthy philosophical answers about morality, so that the teenager will feel that she is heard and being helped. 

8. Speak frankly about boys

Explain to your child how to behave with peers who may not always act appropriately at this age. Let her understand from childhood that on-screen and TV relations between teenagers often don’t reflect real life.


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9. Don’t delay the conversation

Your daughter should know in advance about future changes in the body, menstruation, and pain associated with breast growth. Sometimes, adolescents who develop physically faster than others are mocked by their peers in response to the difference. In this case, enforcing a positive attitude to the situation is no less important than teaching her to accept herself with all the transformations. Sometimes you can start doing this at age 8 if you clearly see that your child needs it.

The natural transformation of a girl into a woman and the subsequent behavior in the puberty period directly depends on how she perceives her body. Prepare yourself that she may drastically change in character, become tearful or aggressive, can cast doubt on your credibility, or become reserved. Especially if she perceives herself as “too tall,” “full of acne,” or “nature's mistake” after hearing these things from others. Only a sincere desire to help and explain what is happening will make her open her heart to you.

The material in this article is for informational purposes only and does not replace the advice of a certified specialist.