Parallel Universe: Most Popular Thoughts Women Have During Their Period

Lifestyle & Health

The average woman will spend nearly ten years of her life menstruating. In other words, about 3,500 days of the average woman’s life will be spent “on the rag.”

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During premenstrual syndrome (PMS), hormones begin to fluctuate in women and alter the levels of chemicals that keep them balanced and alert.  But what exactly happens to women during their period?

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How the menstrual cycle affects a woman's behavior.

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Estrogen and progesterone do a very complicated dance throughout the menstrual cycle. The levels of estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone — the three major hormones that control the menstrual cycle.

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Estrogen levels are closely linked with women’s emotions. As estrogen plunges, it depletes women's mood-boosting chemicals, leading to irritability and negativity.

The rise in estrogen levels during the menstrual cycle deters women from impulsive decision-making.

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Increase in Estrogen levels can affect women's mood, energy, memory, romantic life,  chattiness, extroversion, shopping habits, food cravings and virtually every other part.

The most popular thoughts women have

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So what if it happens every single month? That doesn’t mean we feel any different about it than when we first got it. Here, we give you a few thoughts every woman has during her period. Oh well, at least you’re not alone.

"Wait, I'm a day (or an hour) late…yep, definitely pregnant."

Even if the most action you've seen this month was on Scandal, this will inevitably go through your head. It may be irrational, but it's there. Call your best friend, she'll understand.

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"But…I have cramps."

Whether it's calling out sick, blowing off a party you don't really want to attend, or ordering that second glass of wine, it all gets blamed on cramps. But really, is someone actually punching you in the stomach from the inside? Because that's what it feels like.

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"These chocolate cravings are so bad, I briefly considered robbing a Girl Scout."

You also entertained the idea of eating Nutella for breakfast, splurging on every peanut butter cup in the office vending machine, and baking yourself chocolate cake a la Miranda on Sex and the City. All valid ideas during your period. But here's an even better idea: Chowing down on iron-rich foods to ease PMS symptoms.

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After trying on seven outfits: "Everything looks awful, and I have no clothes."

Annoying bloat can last for days during your period—making you feel less-than-sexy in pretty much anything but sweatpants. Use these tricks to de-bloat fast.

"This Law & Order episode is DEVASTATING."

It's kind of a cruel joke that PMS makes you simultaneously want to curl up on the sofa watching TV and completely lose all control of your emotions at the first sight of that Sarah McLachlan ASPCA commercial. Not cool, biology.

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"Why does it feel like I've been hibernating since 2007 when my alarm clock goes off?"

The exhaustion that comes with your monthly period is enough to make you waste a vacation day. Fight the urge to stay in bed and use these tips for a natural energy boost.

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"We have to do jumping jacks in this boot camp class? Are you kidding me?!"

Your ache-y boobs were uncomfortable just walking to the gym—jumping up and down sounds like torture. Our advice? Pop a pain reliever and find the most supportive sports bra you can find. Then, check out the surprising effect your period has on your workout.

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"No trashcan, really? REALLY?!"

What do I do with…can I just…OK that's going in a balled up piece of toilet paper in my purse, isn't it? Come on, people, it's 2014. Get a trashcan.

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"Great, they forgot the spoon with my take-out soup again, and I have HAD it with this day!"

Why is everyone against you?! Research shows that hormone-induced rage isn't just limited to the days right before your cycle—it actually continues into the first few days of your period. Lucky us, right?

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"Phew, it's over. I can finally leave the tampons at home. WAIT—false alarm."

Ugh, now it's back and it's angry. Why is it that your period likes to pull a little vanishing act every once in a while, only to come back for one last hurrah?

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"OK…NOW it's gone."

I think? See, that wasn't so bad. Being a lady is awesome again!

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Getting rid of the blues.

During periods, it is always good to optimize energy and relax mood swings by following some helpful tips below.

Eat the right food at the right time.

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Drinking more water.

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Doing simple exercises.

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Those different thoughts aren’t so surprising though.

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Again and again, we come back to the fact that all women are different physically, emotionally and psychologically.

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This article is solely for informational purposes. Before using any of the information provided above, consult a certified specialist. Use of the information outlined above can be harmful to health. The editorial board does not guarantee any results and does not bear any responsibility for harm or other consequences that may result from the use of the information provided above.